How have your past girlfriend/boyfriend relationships been?

Fishy

Fishy

tits McGee (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)
I don't know what made me think of it, but today I was reminded of the giant penis/giraffe/abomination that my ex boyfriend had drawn on my bedroom wall at my mother's house. Ignore if you want the random words/graffiti written, if you can even read it.
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Now, this may seem funny to most people, but imagine trying to explain to your mother why there is some giant dick-monster on your wall. It's not that fun. Not to mention that he drew other penis related things in my sister's room when she wasn't home, and she eventually drew like a giant flower over it to make it not seem terrible, haha.

So! My ex boyfriend was somewhat of a douche bag, even though I elected to stay with him for nearly a year and a half. Long story short, he cheated on me and broke up with me the same day, we got back together BEFORE he had told me that he cheated on me, then down the line he mentioned that "he might have kissed this one girl a bunch of times, but he was really sleepy and couldn't really remember." He was a gem, to be frank. ~_~ My current boyfriend is amazing, however, so I am very happy and not at all "that" bitter about anything anymore. All he's good for now is starting off a thread like this.

I am really curious as to the relationships you guys might have had, or even the prospects you're currently/already have pursued! I'm very interested in relationships like these in general, just noticing what attracts a person to someone else, how awful some partners can actually be, how wonderful they can be, etc.

Begin? :)
 
In High School, I didn't really have much interest in girls. Most of them were either unattractive or vapid to me, and I did not expect the relationship I would form in high school to last through university etc., and I do things for the long haul. I had slight crushes on a couple of girls, but none strong enough for me to act upon.

My first year of university, I met one of my classmates long-time best friends. Her name was Katie. I knew she'd had depression in the past because her ex-boyfriend was a bit of a bastard, but she'd always seemed very friendly and happy to me. She was also one of the first girls to pay me a direct compliment, saying that she thought my (very blue) eyes were very pretty. She also made a deliberate effort to teach me how to hug.

She hung out with Jack, my classmate, a lot and in deference to unexplained awkwardness, I told her that I fancied her, but given she was in a relationship I wasn't asking her out or anything, just offering explanation for my awkwardness. Some weeks later, she broke up with her current boyfriend and started going out with me.

I wasn't a particularly good boyfriend (not really knowing what boyfriends are expected to do, etc.), and when Morgan, a very attractive guy a year younger than me, joined Sutekh, she began to be more interested in him than me, and eventually she broke up with me. Long story short, I was very upset, but she never left me alone to grieve afterwards, even after she started dating Morgan. I later learned, she had been diagnosed a sociopath some years ago, which explains why her influence led me to have clinical depression for a year or so.

(Morgan recently broke up with her after she had a HUGE fight with other people in our university club, and she did all sorts of horrible things such as try to OD on painkillers in front of him.)

(EDIT2: Just to clarify, she never cheated on me with Morgan; she broke up with me first, and started dating him a week or two later. It was just obvious that she liked him more than me before we broke up, which is, admittedly, understandable. He's more entertaining and better looking than I am, I'm more relaxed and conservative.)

After I recovered, I met a younger law student named Ioulia. We grew very close, and went out together a few times, but due to some trouble she'd had when she was a girl, coupled with the fact she was interested in both me and a guy from her class (A nice guy, but quite plain looking and a bit boring), the closeness made her uncomfortable so she suddenly decided that we shouldn't go any further.

More recently, I had a bit of a thing for a girl called Caitlin, and I asked her out about a year ago but she said she was waiting on someone to sort some things out, but he'd said he was going to go out with her. I assumed she was taken from then on, and seen her with a boy a few months later, but then on a survey she was taking with a friend of mine present, she labelled single. I asked her out again, and she flirted with me for a while during the study vacation while I helped her and a friend with physics, and I asked her out again sometime later. She turned me down again, saying she was still waiting on the same guy.

The next club get together, she showed up with another member, who had just broken up with his girlfriend of 4 years, who had moved from Perth to Sydney to be with him that year. Apparently, she was extremely tempted by my offer, and had I asked her out just a few days earlier she'd have said yes.



And that's the extent of my relationship experience so far.

EDIT: I'm not really pursuing anyone at the moment, since most of the girls I know are all in relationships now. I still carry a bit of a torch for Caitlin, a larger torch for Ioulia, and none at all for Katie; but I'm more or less resigned to them being off limits now, and I'm open minded to meeting new girls in my law classes next year. My 'bro' Harvey has a girl he wants me to meet, Caitlin's best friend has a girl she wants me to meet, and most of the ladies in the club I'm in have stated they're going to find me a ladyfriend.
 
Oh man fishy this is awesome. I was just thinking about making a relationship-based thread of my own, but this will do.

I've only been in two serious relationships, and have only been in love once. The only one that really mattered (the first one) completely ripped me up and burned me down, and because of that I was able to build myself back up as a completely new person. We're friends again now, and I see her at church once or twice a week. She likes me again, and it's rather obvious. I've told her a couple of times that I'm not looking for a relationship right now and tbh, I'm not really interested in seeing her in the future. One thing I've learned is that people rarely ever change, and it's obvious that she hasn't.

Anyways, I've recently started to the first girl I ever really liked or asked out (in eighth grade). I remember talking to her on the phone for the first time and it was just like "wow, we connect". We lost contact when she moved for three years or so (even though I did look for her on myspace and such), but I just found her again and it's amazing! For the first time since the above-mentioned relationship, I feel like I could totally fall for this person. She's the only other person I've ever "clicked" with, and I'm so anxious/nervous/excited about what might happen. We've been dating now for nearly two weeks - not bf/gf status as we're going to wait a bit longer for that - and I can definitely see it going places.

The only thing that bothers me is...myself. I don't know if I have trust issues or something else, but I just feel like I'm blocking me from being myself sometimes. I'm afraid I come off as bland or disinterested at times when I'm really not. Any advice on how I can "open up" more or just be myself? Is it just time that improves this like it has everything else?
 
Heh, I would have been rather worried about your ex boyfriend's obsession with drawing male genitalia to be honest! Although, one of my friend's has drawn a massive penis on a piece of paper and cello-taped it to my wall as well.. I'm not too sure why I haven't tried to take it down yet.. Haha. Men are strange.

I didn't have what I'd call my first real relationship with a girl until I was 15, with a girl called Jessica. I met her when I was at one of my friend's houses as her dad lived near by. So we got talking there, got together rather quickly. We spoke online and over the phone, then met up again, everything was cool. The main problem was that she lived in Liverpool most of the time and only came to her dad's house every other weekend or so. She convinced her mum to let her come to my house one day, so that happened. But then on her way home, she found out that her mum had read her text messages (she'd brought a different phone to my house for some reason). Oops. Now, I don't recall them being all that bad, but it was a long time ago now! I got threatened over the phone by her mum and step-dad and told never to speak to her again. So, that was the end of that one. She was nice, and pretty.. But ah well. Some parents suck. Her mum even texted me pretending to be my then-ex girlfriend, it was pretty sick really. That's just something you shouldn't do haha. That one lasted maybe three weeks at most.

I didn't get another 'girlfriend' for a while.. I think that relationship ended just before Christmas 2004, then I got another girlfriend in September 2005. I'd 'done things' with other girls in-between, but never had a serious relationship. I actually met Charlotte on the internet first, and found that she lived not-too-far away in Westhoughton. We'd been talking online for months before we met up and had a lot in common; mainly music taste, art, video games etc. We were both starting college soon, as this was towards the end of the summer. We met up a few more times and went to each others houses before we officially 'got together' - which was just as we started college. Due to clashing class schedules, we only really saw each other at weekends due to the distance we'd have to travel and then go to college the next day. I don't regret anything from that relationship. She was really nice and so were her family, they seemed to like me and we all got on. We were together for around six months when she decided that she just didn't really want to be with me any more. It was a bit hard to take at the time, as I'd class her as my first love. She's changed a bit since we broke up - she's into a lot of the same things as me still, but more Japanese things and cosplaying, which isn't my taste. She got together with a cross-dressing bisexual guy who shared more in common with her than I did I guess, and she's still with him now, so I'm very happy for her.

The majority of 2006 is a bit foggy to me, I was enjoying college and experiencing new things. A girl called Charlotte (yeah, again) took a liking to me and asked me out. It'd been a few months since my last girlfriend and I guess I was 'over it' so I just said yes and thought it was worth another try. It started out well, but in the end I just decided I didn't really like her that much and broke up with her.. Not too proud of that. Maybe I should have gotten to know her a bit more before we decided to get together. That lasted about two months or so, maybe more. But hey, I learned from that, or did I?

Some time towards the end of summer that year, I got back in touch with a girl called Lauren I knew from High School (who I chatted to a bit in History class but never much else) and realised that I thought she was very attractive now (haha). So I just went ahead and asked her out and she said yes. So we did the usual stuff and it was going okay, but we eventually both decided that we weren't right for one another and that was it. That lasted about two months as well. Now, I think I learned here that you need to get to know a girl quite a bit before you decide to ask them out. However, timing it right so they don't pull the whole "but we're too good friends, I wouldn't want to ruin that" story is another thing!

Luckily, I'd known Kirsty for a while now. She'd been the one to first come to talk to me in college, and we'd been to the cinema (just as friends) a few times. She also took me to a concert she won tickets for to see Taking Back Sunday, and then asked me to the cinema again... I kissed her there, but she seemingly didn't want to be in a relationship with me. I've never really found out why, she was apparently being silly about it and just changed her mind eventually. But once we got together - we were together. She's amazing and I've been with her for over three years, we're engaged and everything is going perfectly.

So, yeah.. Some bad, some average, some good, and some great experiences for me when it comes to relationships! Good thread Fishy, we should talk on MSN some more really.
 
Bam said:
The only thing that bothers me is...myself. I don't know if I have trust issues or something else, but I just feel like I'm blocking me from being myself sometimes. I'm afraid I come off as bland or disinterested at times when I'm really not. Any advice on how I can "open up" more or just be myself? Is it just time that improves this like it has everything else?
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I am somewhat in your position right now, only slightly different. I've realized that I'm not exactly "myself with Daniel (boyfriend) as much as I am, say, online or really just by myself. Most people who know/talk to me here can say that I'm very open and honest, somewhat vulgar, a bit neurotic. With Daniel and then all of my past boyfriends, I've somewhat been like this. I keep my real thoughts to myself most of the time, because I feel that if I were to blurt them out (as I do on IRC etc) I would get weird looks, or "WTFs" from people generally, this isn't even exclusive to just boyfriends. I've only ever been my unabashedly crazy self online, or when I'm alone and talking to myself (which I do quite often apparently, aha).

So Bam, I wouldn't necessarily say it's you that has a problem. I mean, yes, if you're keeping to yourself because you're worried about rejection or what have you, or you've just got a self esteem thing about thinking you're not interesting enough, it might be a problem, TO YOU. But I've been thinking about this a lot myself and, maybe it's not me, it's him? Maybe he really ISN'T the type of person that could accept me and all my behavior, my neurotic tendencies, my trivial needs and wants (like always having even numbers of everything, and refusing anything if I don't). For example, I have this unknown tendency to like, bounce my leg/foot very fast, or my hands, or something, because it's nearly impossible for me to keep still. He always tries to stop me, and I really tell him that I can't not do it, but he just blows it off like "sigh, whatever." I don't know, that may sound silly, but I guess I like to be around people that notice the things I do, and just accept it, and even enjoy it! That'd be the best. But Bam, you could just be worried since you really like her! Honestly I love Daniel to death, and it would be no easy task letting him go for whatever reason (I can't even imagine that) but I think that I even need to let him in a little more.

I would say yes, time is what you'll need more than anything else. Either you know exactly how a person is at the beginning of a relationship, and you decide you like it or not, OR, someone is such an enigma that has revealed a few characteristics that you either believe you want to learn more, or you're uninterested. First off, you're dating the girl now, yes? So she must be interested in you. If anything, make it a game for yourself to allow her to see more and more aspects about you, and if you can tell that she loves/accepts those aspects, reward yourself by kissing her or something ;D. Haha, I don't know. I feel like finding and staying with your "true love" or just best match at present requires being entirely yourself, and having them take it or leave it. Although the actual revealing process may take time, if you really like this girl, risk it! Risk it all! If she loves you for you, bravo. Your risk was worth it.

edit: also Havak, I love that you seem to be enjoying a "Happy ending" to all your past girlfriend escapades, aha. We should talk on msn more, I'm just hardly on a lot. If someone isn't online that I am looking to talk to, I basically just ignore it, hah. I don't even remember what your username is, but I imagine you have me, so just IM me sometime!

@bugcatcherjason: that is surprising! did you ever go to Japan for that wedding or whatever? I didn't see you..
 
IAWTP.

EDIT: Actually, to add content to this post; prior to Katie, and for the depressive time afterwards, I did not have good self-esteem. An older girl I know, who I've always had a huge amount of respect for said the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me (while she was on acid at the time), and that was basically how I came out of depression, and I started getting slightly better self-esteem after that.

Nowadays, my self-esteem is much better, and I can't remember how I got it there; I think it was just this year, when Harvey joined me at USyd, and I started my Honours degree. It made me feel more grown up or something, I started to realize that actually, I am pretty cool. I'm not hideous, even if I'm no Adonis (Ioulia described me as the best looking guy in the club, and Caitlin said she has always thought she was very cute, which was confirmed independently by her friend). I am one of the most highly qualified individuals of my age. I have a very diverse range of interests, and can have a conversation with anyone about almost any topic. I am a stable, nice, sweet, and Romantic (capital R) guy.

My recommendation is to take a step back and really list to yourself all of the things that you think are positives. Find the positives that you believe are true, and find the evidence to convince yourself of it.
 
Let's see, girlfriend gets pregnant one day and tells my entire family before she tells me. Does that sound like a good relationship to you?

Well, I'm in no hurry to have my heart broken again so ...
 
Ok I feel this will be destined as much to you as to myself, so please excuse me if it looks uninteresting or boring or whatever...

I haven't had a real relationship yet, except with one girl who I agreed to marry when I was 6 - I've never seen her again since I moved to elementary school.

The several times I've moved house have pretty much regulated my childhood (I don't consider it to have ended yet). I moved when I was 3, 7, 12, 14, 16 and 18 approximately, which means I never stayed more than 2 years in the same place during the years that matter. I did have some crushes though, but I'm so very naive, I was afraid to go into anything too serious as I knew I would eventually move out after some time... Or at least, that's what I convince myself of, maybe I just didn't interest any girl!

When I was 13, I was living in Mexico. That's where I met the first girl I 'loved' (at that time I thought it was love) - she was very very pretty, and I still think she's the prettiest girl I've ever met - or at least she defines what I like in a girl, when it comes to looks. I didn't really know her though, she was just the pretty girl in my class. For Valentine's day, I bought a red rose, and gave it to her; she smiled and said thanks, and just a second later the tallest man in the world (not really, but that's how he looked to me at that time), who was two years older, pushed me aside and gave her a bunch of roses which made the one I'd offered look like a dumb daisy. That was the end of it, I learned later she'd been dating that giant for more than a year.

After that I moved to London, and it's a similar story, although it might have been a wasted opportunity rather than a hopeless cause. There was that girl called Coralie, everyone called her Coco and everyone admired her. I didn't know her that much, but we were in the same class for two years straight, so we weren't completely strangers either. I still don't know what my feelings were at that time, since as I said I was sort of restricting myself from falling for anyone... but what I do know is that, on the last day of school - well in fact no, it was the last day before the Christmas holidays but I was moving so I would never see my friends from London again - she hugged me and I was literally paralyzed (it was both shyness, the thought that I didn't deserve that and the fear of having too many regrets) so she looked at me and said those words which I remember distinctly, 'you could at least hug back!', and walked away. I was speechless but eventually I realised I was about to miss the train and I didn't have the time to think about what happened, I had to go.

The following year was back in France. I knew a girl who was kinda cute and kind, and I thought she liked me but a friend of mine told me he heard her talk about me with another girl during class, and that it was not anything that'd make me happy, so I stopped seeing her - but it didn't really matter to me anyway. Then, one year later (still in France), a girl who intrigued me a lot arrived in the school I was in, she was a year younger than me. Guess what, I never got to know her! Haha quite pitiful isn't it. The day before I left, I wrote her a poem (with a quill, using red ink, on a very nice parchment-like paper... yeah) and I gave it to her -oh so romantic- while she was waiting for a bus, then ran away as I was very much afraid of having a heart attack!

That's it for past relationships! I think I am in a relationship right now but it's a bit strange, I wouldn't want to go into too much detail without her consent, and I'm not entirely sure of where we stand. Let's just say that while I don't know if I'll ever know for sure what love is, this is without a doubt the closest to it that I've ever been - she redefines what I am daily, she makes me both very very happy and very very sad and worried at times, because I discover little by little how much I care about her and how little self-confidence I have. I over-analyze everything she says and while sometimes it doesn't matter, sometimes it does and it makes me doubt a lot about how she feels in general and about me. It's my entirely my fault, although I would only need to be reassured once in a while - time will tell how that goes, but in any case I'll be very grateful because I'm currently experiencing with her what is certainly one of the most interesting, intense, and, well, fantastic moments of my life.
 
Sooo relationships eh?

I was brought up believing all that Hollywood bullshit: you bumble merrily along with life then meet a girl when you're 15 and fall in love and live happily ever after. This a) made me pretty shy talking to girls and b) made me blow things out of proportion all the time. I was OK chatting online to girls but honestly I had some properly cringeworthy experiences in my early teens.

My first real relationship started when I was 15. I'd "gone out with" this girl when I was 13 but I didn't really have the first clue what to do beyond holding hands in school and all that shit. She broke up with me the first time round and fair play to her, I was pretty pathetic. Anyway, I asked her to prom when I was 15 and she said she would go with me if I went round to her house. I'd never actually been alone with a girl before but from nowhere I suddenly grew a pair of balls and kissed her. Thus started a 2 year relationship that I still don't think is entirely "over" 4 years after it officially finished. She was my first love and I took it pretty hard when we broke up (we were going to different universities). I still think fondly of her and honestly she's the only girl who gives me butterflies. Possibly because in every other relationship I've had, I was explicitly the one to end it.

I think this first experience has tainted the rest of my relationships since. She's always the benchmark, the one I compare girls to, and I don't think anyone quite matches up to her. Throughout university I've been in relationships on various levels with a fair few girls, having lost the awkwardness I had as a teenager. Most were just sex to me (I realise this sounds harsh but it's true), I didn't really make a proper connection with anyone until I met my current girlfriend.

So yeah here I am, in a contented relationship with a girl who is cute and fun, and entirely devoted to me. I am very fond of her, and definitely wouldn't want to hurt her in any way. But I don't think this is it. I just can't help but want for something more, someone who truly shakes my world up and makes life exciting. On the other hand, I don't want to end my current relationship for obvious reasons.

I have thought about this for a while and my plan is to go away for a time. I have always wanted to do a ski season and next year seems like the perfect time. It would give me some time away from my girlfriend, and hopefully enlighten myself as to my real feelings (which I'm not even sure about right now).
 
Time for me to cry in my beer...

From about April to October of this year, I probably had my most serious relationship with my neighbor. Played drums, pretty, smart, blah blah blah. Things kinda drifted apart and we saw each other less and less. Next thing I knew, we were broken up and she was dating someone else. We saw each other less and less, so the pain of the breakup was pretty nonexistent after the first two hours. I guess it shows you how strong our relationship was...

By the way, just a slightly random piece of advice to anyone here. Do NOT try to be nice to a girl to be friends first, and then try to start a more serious relationship. It does not work like that. Flirt, but don't get too close until the real relationship starts.
 
Never had one. I would sorta like a boyfriend but seeing how difficult that thing is around here...

I think I would LIKE to try trusting someone with my true self sometime. Just sometime, maybe. But it just feels so wrong...

edit: I'm most likely dying alone heh
 
Relationships... ugh. I've had quite the experiences.

I never really had a 'boyfriend' til I was 16, but I wouldn't officially call it a relationship. We didn't do much, just hung out every once in a while. I mean, we both liked each other and stuff, but whatever. We broke up cuz it wasn't working out as well as we had hoped, but he is officially 'gay' now. Sometimes I wonder if I made him change hahaha

After that, I had a relationship with another guy. He was so sweet- a genuine gentleman, class president, the sweetest guy in the high school. We were together for, eh, 4 months but then he abruptly decided he didn't want to be serious. Gave me some stupid excuse about college tests and whatever. Turns out he was only dating me to lose his virginity. Whatever.

So after that, I really wasn't sure what I wanted to do about guys. I'd definitely been hurt by the last one... But it turns out one of my best guy friends wanted to start something. So we started dating... and I just don't know what to do with him anymore.

We dated for 6 months, then he went off to a college in the middle of nowhere 13 hours away. So that pretty much sucked. It was okay for awhile, but the relationship lost a lot of its charm. I broke up with him and he did NOT take it well. Punched a couple things including a dresser and a roommate's face... ended up shattering all his knuckles in his right hand.

I didn't date again for another 5 months. The new boyfriend came off as sweet at first, but he was a real liar. Lied to me about religion/God, seriously pressured me to do things that I really didn't want to, so I cut it off with him. Can't stand him anymore. Good riddance.

Yet, that same guy up there who was in college in Wisconsin decided to come home and mess with my life again. We were kinda in a relationship again... but not really. He just went a bit crazy this time, insisting that we were getting married. He told me he had bought the ring and was gonna propose come Christmastime. I told him to back off, and he threatened to commit suicide.

Like, what do you do at that point? Leave him be and let him die? Idk... We ended up drifting apart these last few weeks. He has backed off to an extent, but i don't know. I want to move on, but I just can't seem to get away from him. It's like I'm trapped with him forever, and I seriously don't know how to react at all. Any thoughts on this?
 
godudette said:
He was so sweet- a genuine gentleman, class president, the sweetest guy in the high school... Turns out he was only dating me to lose his virginity. Whatever.
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erm...

About your suicidal boyfriend, don't let him rule your life - if you think he might really commit suicide if you break up, talk to his parents or to another third party (school psychologist maybe) before doing it. I'm not telling you to be purposefully harsh but you don't have to do what he asks, no matter what he threatens to do if you don't listen to him.
 
godudette said:
Like, what do you do at that point? Leave him be and let him die? Idk... We ended up drifting apart these last few weeks. He has backed off to an extent, but i don't know. I want to move on, but I just can't seem to get away from him. It's like I'm trapped with him forever, and I seriously don't know how to react at all. Any thoughts on this?
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I've never been in a situation like this, but honestly, if you really think that his health/life is at risk by his own actions, you should tell someone. You need to make it very clear to this person that you want nothing to do with them (if that's really the case) but if you're seriously worried about the consequences of that, you need to make sure that there is a safety net for him before you drop the bomb. I don't know exactly how you'd do this; tell a family member of his, or a close friend? Someone who could immediately be there to look after him after you explain your feelings? I don't want to say "if he commits suicide it's not your fault" because you would probably feel awful/responsible, but even if it comes down to that (god forbid) you would need to realize that ultimately, there was nothing you could do.

Feeling trapped in ANY kind of relationship is always the wrong sort of feeling. However you see fit, I think you should try and end this relationship as smoothly and quickly as possible, even if the best route is simply ignoring/avoiding him until he gets the message, but then again, that could have poor repercussions. My best advice: let someone else in on the situation between you two.
 
Thanks for the replies. I have told his best friend and they talked about it. I made him talk about it with his mother, too (told him that if he didn't call her, I would).

Just to clarify, we are no longer dating, yet he feels like I'm still 'his.' It's just very difficult to look into another relationship when he's watching my every move. I asked him if he had moved on at all in these last couple weeks- he said no. Ugh.
 
Fishy said:
...I think you should try and end this relationship as smoothly and quickly as possible, even if the best route is simply ignoring/avoiding him until he gets the message...
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I don't agree with that. Being ignored or avoided would be the most painful thing for me - I would rather be told in some manner, even via a text message or something, that it's over. If you ignore him you're just making doubt more and more as time passes, that's mental torture and it stops him from moving on... Well- that's my opinion at least.
 
Well Accent, I only really meant that you should do that after you've told him your feelings, but he just still won't get the message. That's basically a last resort kind of thing, since you've done all you can on your end, and it's just up to the other side to give it up.
 
Well yeah I guess if he has a problem realising that it's over, which is plausible considering what we've been told, I guess at some point you'd just have to forget about it and move on.

Or you can suicide him once and for all but that would be a bit extreme, don't do it godudette!
 
Accent said:
Or you can suicide him once and for all but that would be a bit extreme, don't do it godudette!
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^hahaha =)

If only life were that simple. But I definitely find the suggestion amusing... a sig-worthy quote, either way~
 
Accent said:
I don't agree with that. Being ignored or avoided would be the most painful thing for me - I would rather be told in some manner, even via a text message or something, that it's over. If you ignore him you're just making doubt more and more as time passes, that's mental torture and it stops him from moving on... Well- that's my opinion at least.
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You only feel like that at first. After my girlfriend broke up with me, I struggled for ages and was desperate for her attention and whatnot, which is why I liked that she wasn't just ignoring me. But it was really just about giving false hope to myself. Around December she cutoff contact, and within a month I was better.

After a bad break up, cutting off contact entirely and making yourself as distant from them as you can is the fastest track to letting them get over it.

In that particular case with geodudette, there is no reason that ANYONE should feel obligated to be in a relationship. The relationship is never going to be healthy or fulfilling if that happened. Your best bet is to tell him it's over, keep your distance, and if you fear he's going to do something stupid, maybe tell his doctor or parents/friends and get them to encourage him to see someone.

Someone else committing suicide is never your responsibility, it is always theirs.
 
MrIndigo said:
After a bad break up, cutting off contact entirely and making yourself as distant from them as you can is the fastest track to letting them get over it.
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After a bad break up, yes; I was assuming there had not been any break up yet. In my opinion ignoring someone is the worst way of actually breaking up (last resort, as Fishy said)... But of course if you've already told the guy/girl that you don't want to see them again, that you don't love them anymore, or something equivalent, then avoiding them would be the fastest way to make them forget about you... I think.

godudette said:
If only life were that simple.
Click to expand...
Or, in that case, death...
 
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