RU Umbreon

Aquarius Ghost ❤

Banned deucer.
[SET]
name: Defensive Cleric
move 1: Wish
move 2: Protect
move 3: Heal Bell / Toxic
move 4: Foul Play
item: Leftovers / Heavy-Duty Boots
ability: Synchronize
nature: Calm
evs: 252 HP / 4 Def / 252 SpD


[SET COMMENTS]
With access to Wish, Heal Bell, and amazing defenses, Umbreon becomes a good choice as a special wall for balance and stall teams. Umbreon has an ideal movepool for a cleric in RU, being able to support its team with Wish and Heal Bell or beat threats on its own with the combination of Wish, Protect, and Foul Play. Protect pairs nicely with Wish and allows Umbreon to scout for common Choice item users such as Passimian, Golurk, and Indeedee-F while gaining more Leftovers recovery. On stall builds, you'd want Heal Bell unless you have another cleric, whereas Toxic is an option for more balanced builds to make Umbreon less passive by enabling it to punish some of its switch-ins. Foul Play is a reliable move that puts a lot of pressure on many physical attackers. A Calm nature is used to maximize Umbreon's special bulk in order to handle threats like Charizard, Dragalge, Sigilyph, and Goodra. Alternatively, an EV spread of 252 HP / 200 SpD / 56 Spe paired with a Calm nature allows Umbreon to outpace Adamant Dhelmise and Rhyperior. Synchronize is a useful ability alongside Heal Bell, providing Umbreon with opportunities to potentially cause the foe to become poisoned, burned, or paralyzed. Leftovers provides Umbreon with passive recovery and increased longevity, while Heavy-Duty Boots allows it to switch in freely without getting pressured by entry hazards.

Umbreon pairs well with Mantine and Galarian Slowbro, as they are both able to tank Fighting-type hits and provide nice utility for it. Umbreon appreciates some offensive teammates such as Silvally-Fairy, Bewear, and Dragalge, as they can check Fighting- and Dark-types like Hitmonlee and Drapion while remaining healthy thanks to Umbreon's Wish support. Unaware and Haze users such as Quagsire and Milotic pair well with Umbreon, since they can handle setup sweepers such as Scrafty, Drapion, and Bewear. Entry hazards can put pressure on Umbreon even if it has Heavy-Duty Boots, so entry hazard removal from Pokemon like Mantine, Charizard, Eldegoss, and Silvally works well with it. Gardevior and Silvally-Fairy can easily wear down Umbreon, so bulky Steel-types like Bronzong, Assault Vest Copperajah, and Steelix make good teammates.


[CREDITS]
- Written by: [[Aquarius Ghost ❤, 519583]]
- Quality checked by: [[MrAldo, 227521], [natan, 321109]]
- Grammar checked by: [[Deetah, 297659]]
 
Last edited:
To be quite honest, I like it. Pretty informative. But some stuff needs to be trimmed:

" Umbreon is able to wall a large array of Pokemon such as: Sigilyph, Charizard, Vaporeon, Jellicent, other Umbreon's, and many more. Umbreon fits on balance / stall teams because of its natural attribute of being a cleric. Umbreon usually used to sponge a variety of high-powered Special attacking hits in order to provide excellent team support. Umbreon struggles against several setup Pokemon such as Klefki, Nasty Plot Toxicroak, Swords Dance Virizion, and Bulk Up Scrafty. Foul Play with Wish + Protect adjusts Umbreon to be independent in certain situations"

The last paragraph feels unnecessary and some parts redundant. For example: The part where you mention the pokemon it can "wall" looks more fitting to mention on the part where you mention the EV spread. Like "Calm Nature to maximize special bulk in order to handle Charizard, Dragalge, Sigilyph. Just a couple of examples, no need to put that many, and unnecessary to add many more, we get the idea.

"Umbreon fits on balance / stall teams because of its natural attribute of being a cleric." You can use this line to finish the first paragraph.

The rest "Umbreon usually used to sponge a variety of high-powered Special attacking hits in order to provide excellent team support. Umbreon struggles against several setup Pokemon such as Klefki, Nasty Plot Toxicroak, Swords Dance Virizion, and Bulk Up Scrafty. Foul Play with Wish + Protect adjusts Umbreon to be independent in certain situations" you can trim/remove it, it is overstated by the general description, ev spread, and teammate options that it is vulnerable to said threats.

I believe the teammate paragraph is too focused on the stall aspect (I get it is your choice but still). Mention partners for the balance like Silvally-Fairy to handle Dark types, Sigilyph for the fighting types. The steel types part is perfect.

This is overall, pretty decent, just need to trim it in some redundant aspects. I know you want to show as much as you can but many times less is more.

QC 1/2 after this is implemented. Good luck.
 
Good job, but there are still some stuff I think needs a rework:
  • Putting "one of the best special walls" oversells Umbreon a bit, it's good at eating special hits but it's usually not your first mon of choice to do so (unless its stall), because of it's passivity and flaws in general, so just put like "With its amazing defensive stats and utility, it is a good choice as a special wall for balance and stall teams". This way you can also remove a sentence later in this paragraph
  • You don't need to explain the moves, everyone knows how WishTect and Heal Bell work, just mention when you would want Heal Bell x Toxic (on Stall builds you'd want Heal Bell unless you have another cleric, whereas Toxic is an option for more balanced builds to make it less passive by enabling it to punish some of its switch-ins)
  • If you're explaining Lefties, mention why Boots are slashed, specially since they're much less obvious on Umby then Lefties are
  • "Umbreon usually used to sponge a variety of high-powered Special attacking hits in order to provide excellent team support. Foul Play with Wish + Protect adjusts Umbreon to be independent in certain situations. Umbreon fits on balance/stall teams because of its natural attribute of being a cleric."
    • The first sentenece is kinda pointless, you already mention how it's used to beat special mons and the support it has, while the last one I merged somewhere in the first sentences, so just remove both.
    • The other part, the one talking about FP + Wish + Tect is also smth you can just remove, but if you wanna mention smth about that, just change the first sentence to, imo just remove it tho.
      • "Umbreon has an ideal movepool for a cleric in RU, being able to support its team with Wish and Heal Bell or beat threats on its own with Wish + Protect + Foul Play"
  • When you mention FairyVally, Galge, and Bear, I think it makes more sense to mention them as Fighting and Dark checks, Umbreon doesn't care that much about beating or not other mons, unless it's mons that give it trouble, which is why those are good teammates for it.
  • When you mention hazard control, rephrase it so it doesn't sound like having Boots allows you to just forego hazard control, having it is still useful in case you get knocked + teams Umbreon is used in always want hazard control to avoid getting overpressured by hazards.
  • You mention Quag three times and I think the sentences feel a bit weird: first you mention it as a Fighting-type check (which is not true, it can check SD Bewear and stuff like Scrafty but it's not the mon that's gonna be switching into Fighting-types for your team like Bro-G might be), then you say that "if not using Unaware/Haze, setup sweepers can be a problem, so you can use [mons that only beat them through Haze/Unaware]", so just do the following things:
    • Mention other Fighting-type checks alongside Slowbro-G in the first sentence, or just Slowbro-G, but not Quagsire.
    • Phrase the part that mentions Unaware/Haze to cover everything else, just to give you an idea, smth like that (also you don't need that many examples, and none of the mons you mention are great Virizion checks so I would just remove it, you've already mentioned checks for that in Slowbro and Dragalge anyway):
      • Unaware / Haze users such as Quagsire, Mantine, and Milotic pair well with Umbreon so that its inability to stop setup sweepers such as [mons] doesn't become a liability. (if you want you can expand on Quagsire if you feel like it goes so well w it, which I'd assume from the ammount of times you mentioned it originally, explaining what else it does besides checking those mons)
    • Remove the part that says "If not using Haze/Unaware...", unless you're gonna mention smth like revenge killers to deal w those, which I don't think you need to do, but if you do just move this bit to right after the sentence I above.
  • What's the point of the last sentence? Since this is team options I assume you might wanna mention smth that can help it w Trick users, if not just remove it, it's the kind of usage tips that you don't put in a preview unless you give mons to help w it anyway.
QC 2/2 after implementing that
 
Hey there Aquarius Ghost ❤, there are many errors in this analysis that make it quite difficult to check. I'd very much appreciate it if you would take the time to fix the common grammar mistakes present and fix the overall formatting to match the listed template. The Spelling & Grammar Standards is a great resource for new writers that I definitely recommend taking a look at. Once you've gone through and fixed some of the basic mistakes I'd be glad to go over it and give you a check!

[SET]
name:
move 1:
move 2:
move 3:
move 4:
item:
ability:
nature:
evs:

[SET COMMENTS]
info

[CREDITS]
- Written by: [[username1, userid1]]
- Quality checked by: [[username1, userid1], [username2, userid2]]
- Grammar checked by: [[username1, userid1]]
 
Add Remove Comments (AC) = Add Comma (RC) = Remove Comma
Thank you for taking the time to fix up some of the formatting issues! There are still quite a bit of changes here, so I'm going to have you implement these first using https://spo.ink/gpvideo and then I'll go through it a second time to make sure nothing else needs to be changed.

[SET]
name: Defensive Cleric
move 1: Wish
move 2: Protect
move 3: Heal Bell / Toxic
move 4: Foul Play
item: Leftovers / Heavy-Duty Boots
ability: Synchronize
nature: Calm
evs: 252 HP / 252 SpD / 4 Spe

[SET COMMENTS]
With access to Wish, Heal Bell, and its amazing defense stats defenses, Umbreon becomes a good choice as a special wall (Lowercase) for balance / and stall teams. Umbreon has an ideal movepool for a cleric in RU, being able to support its team with Wish and Heal Bell or beat threats on its own with the combination of Wish, Protect, and Foul Play. Protect ensures that pairs nicely with Wish succeeds while allowing and allows Umbreon to scout for common Choice item users such as Passimain Passimian, Golurk, and Indeedee-F while gaining more Leftovers (Capitalize) recovery. On stall builds, you'd want Heal Bell unless you have another cleric, whereas Toxic is an option for more balanced builds to make it Umbreon less passive by enabling it to punish some of its switch-ins. Foul Play is a reliable move that puts a lot of pressure on many of the physical attackers. A Calm nature is used to maximize its Umbreon's special bulk in order to handle threats like; (Remove semicolon) Charizard, Dragalge, Sigilyph, and Goodra. An alternative Ev' Alternatively, an EV spread is of 252 Hp HP / 200 SpD / 56 Spe is viable paired with with a Calm nature, (RC) this spread allows you Umbreon to outpace Adamant Dhelmise and Rhyperior. Synchronize is a useful ability alongside Heal Bell, providing Umbreon with opportunities to potentially cause your opponents Pokemon the foe to become poisoned / burned / paralyzed poisoned, burned, or paralyzed. leftovers provide Leftovers provides Umbreon with passive recovery and increased longevity, while Heavy-Duty-Boots Heavy-Duty Boots allows Umbreon it to switch-in switch in freely without getting pressured by entry hazards. Umbreon has an ideal move-pool for a cleric in RU, being able to support its team with Wish and Heal Bell or beat threats on its own with Wish+ Protect + Foul Play. (This sentence makes a lot more sense at the beginning)

Umbreon pairs well with Mantine and Galarian-Slowbro Galarian Slowbro, as they are both able to tank fighting types Fighting-type hits, (RC) they both and provide nice utility for the team it. Umbreon appreciates some offensive teammates such as Silvally-Fairy, Bewear, and Dragalge, (AC) to check fighting / dark types like Hitmonlee, Drapion, as they can check Fighting- and Dark-types like Hitmonlee and Drapion while remaining healthy with thanks to Umbreon's Wish support. Unaware / and Haze users such as Quagsire and Milotic pair well with Umbreon, (AC) so that its inability to stop since they can handle setup sweepers such as Scrafty, Drapion, and Bewear doesn't become a liability for it. Entry hazards can put pressure on Umbreon easily even if you have Heavy-Duty-Boots which is able to get knocked off even if it has Heavy-Duty Boots, so entry hazard removal methods from Pokemon like Mantine, Charizard, Eldegoss, and Silvally works well with it. Gardevior, (RC) and Silvally-Fairy can easily wear down Umbreon, so bulky steels Steel-types like Bronzong, Av Assault Vest Copperajah, and Steelix can contrast against their super-effective attacks make good teammates.


[CREDITS]
- Written by: [[Aquarius Ghost ❤, 519583]]
- Quality checked by: [[MrAldo,227521],[natan,321109]] [[MrAldo, 227521], [natan, 321109]] (Spacing)
- Grammar checked by: [[username1, userid1]]
 
deetah said:
Add Remove Comments (AC) = Add Comma (RC) = Remove Comma
Thank you for taking the time to fix up some of the formatting issues! There are still quite a bit of changes here, so I'm going to have you implement these first using https://spo.ink/gpvideo and then I'll go through it a second time to make sure nothing else needs to be changed.

[SET]
name: Defensive Cleric
move 1: Wish
move 2: Protect
move 3: Heal Bell / Toxic
move 4: Foul Play
item: Leftovers / Heavy-Duty Boots
ability: Synchronize
nature: Calm
evs: 252 HP / 252 SpD / 4 Spe

[SET COMMENTS]
With access to Wish, Heal Bell, and its amazing defense stats defenses, Umbreon becomes a good choice as a special wall (Lowercase) for balance / and stall teams. Umbreon has an ideal movepool for a cleric in RU, being able to support its team with Wish and Heal Bell or beat threats on its own with the combination of Wish, Protect, and Foul Play. Protect ensures that pairs nicely with Wish succeeds while allowing and allows Umbreon to scout for common Choice item users such as Passimain Passimian, Golurk, and Indeedee-F while gaining more Leftovers (Capitalize) recovery. On stall builds, you'd want Heal Bell unless you have another cleric, whereas Toxic is an option for more balanced builds to make it Umbreon less passive by enabling it to punish some of its switch-ins. Foul Play is a reliable move that puts a lot of pressure on many of the physical attackers. A Calm nature is used to maximize its Umbreon's special bulk in order to handle threats like; (Remove semicolon) Charizard, Dragalge, Sigilyph, and Goodra. An alternative Ev' Alternatively, an EV spread is of 252 Hp HP / 200 SpD / 56 Spe is viable paired with with a Calm nature, (RC) this spread allows you Umbreon to outpace Adamant Dhelmise and Rhyperior. Synchronize is a useful ability alongside Heal Bell, providing Umbreon with opportunities to potentially cause your opponents Pokemon the foe to become poisoned / burned / paralyzed poisoned, burned, or paralyzed. leftovers provide Leftovers provides Umbreon with passive recovery and increased longevity, while Heavy-Duty-Boots Heavy-Duty Boots allows Umbreon it to switch-in switch in freely without getting pressured by entry hazards. Umbreon has an ideal move-pool for a cleric in RU, being able to support its team with Wish and Heal Bell or beat threats on its own with Wish+ Protect + Foul Play. (This sentence makes a lot more sense at the beginning)

Umbreon pairs well with Mantine and Galarian-Slowbro Galarian Slowbro, as they are both able to tank fighting types Fighting-type hits, (RC) they both and provide nice utility for the team it. Umbreon appreciates some offensive teammates such as Silvally-Fairy, Bewear, and Dragalge, (AC) to check fighting / dark types like Hitmonlee, Drapion, as they can check Fighting- and Dark-types like Hitmonlee and Drapion while remaining healthy with thanks to Umbreon's Wish support. Unaware / and Haze users such as Quagsire and Milotic pair well with Umbreon, (AC) so that its inability to stop since they can handle setup sweepers such as Scrafty, Drapion, and Bewear doesn't become a liability for it. Entry hazards can put pressure on Umbreon easily even if you have Heavy-Duty-Boots which is able to get knocked off even if it has Heavy-Duty Boots, so entry hazard removal methods from Pokemon like Mantine, Charizard, Eldegoss, and Silvally works well with it. Gardevior, (RC) and Silvally-Fairy can easily wear down Umbreon, so bulky steels Steel-types like Bronzong, Av Assault Vest Copperajah, and Steelix can contrast against their super-effective attacks make good teammates.


[CREDITS]
- Written by: [[Aquarius Ghost ❤, 519583]]
- Quality checked by: [[MrAldo,227521],[natan,321109]] [[MrAldo, 227521], [natan, 321109]] (Spacing)
- Grammar checked by: [[username1, userid1]]
Click to expand...
I implemented all the changes.
 
Add Remove Comments
Huge improvement, implement these final few changes and it will be good to go.

GP 1/1

shinxstamp.gif


[SET]
name: Defensive Cleric
move 1: Wish
move 2: Protect
move 3: Heal Bell / Toxic
move 4: Foul Play
item: Leftovers / Heavy-Duty Boots
ability: Synchronize
nature: Calm
evs: 252 HP / 252 SpD / 4 Spe

[SET COMMENTS]
With access to Wish, Heal Bell, and amazing defenses, Umbreon becomes a good choice as a special stall wall for balance and stall teams. Umbreon has an ideal movepool for a cleric in RU, being able to support its team with Wish and Heal Bell or beat threats on its own with the combination of Wish, Protect, and Foul Play. Protect pairs nicely with Wish and allows Umbreon to scout for common Choice item users such as Passimian, Golurk, and Indeedee-F while gaining more Leftovers recovery. On stall builds, you'd want Heal Bell unless you have another cleric, whereas Toxic is an option for more balanced builds to make Umbreon less passive by enabling it to punish some of its switch-ins. Foul Play is a reliable move that puts a lot of pressure on many physical attackers. A Calm nature is used to maximize Umbreon's special bulk in order to handle threats like Charizard, Dragalge, Sigilyph, and Goodra. Alternatively, an EV spread of 252 HP / 200 SpD / 56 Spe paired with a Calm nature allows Umbreon to outpace Adamant Dhelmise and Rhyperior. Synchronize is a useful ability alongside Heal Bell, providing Umbreon with opportunities to potentially cause the foe to become poisoned, burned, or paralyzed. Leftovers provide provides Umbreon with passive recovery and increased longevity, whileHeavy-Duty Boots while Heavy-Duty Boots (Spacing) allows it to switch-in switch in freely without getting pressured by entry hazards.

Umbreon pairs well with Mantine and Galarian Slowbro, as they are both able to tank Fighting-type hits and provide nice utility for it. Umbreon appreciates some offensive teammates such as Silvally-Fairy, Bewear, and Dragalge, as they can check Fighting- and Dark-types like Hitmonlee and Drapion while remaining healthy thanks to Umbreon's Wish support. Unaware and Haze users such as Quagsire and Milotic pair well with Umbreon, since they can handle setup sweepers such as Scrafty, Drapion, and Bewear. Entry hazards can put pressure on Umbreon even if it has Heavy-Duty Boots, so entry hazard removal from Pokemon like Mantine, Charizard, Eldegoss, and Silvally works well with it. Gardevior and Silvally-Fairy can easily wear down Umbreon, so bulky Steel-types like Bronzong, Assault Vest Copperajah, and Steelix make good teammates.


[CREDITS]
- Written by: [[Aquarius Ghost ❤, 519583]]
- Quality checked by: [[MrAldo, 227521], [natan, 321109]]
- Grammar checked by: [[username1, userid1]]
 
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