Serious Relationships and Sex Ed Thread

fuck uni.

This is the third time I've been friendzoned since I started.

Discuss methods of avoiding this terrible affliction.
 
Don't be a stupid arsehole who only pretends to be interested in women in a platonic way in order to get into her pants later? Or alternatively, if you aren't even bothering to pretend to be friends with these women in the first place, realise that they aren't actually friendzoning you. They're probably trying to say "you're a repulsive shitlord I'd never want to date" in a polite way.

PS: You're not owed a date and/or sex just because you're nice to someone. You might say you don't think you're owed these things, but complaining about women wanting to be friends with you instead of dates and previous complaints re: expecting sex to result from buying someone dinner and/or gifts says yeah, you absolutely do believe you are.
PPS: Fuck friendzone discussion.
 
^That's a whole lot of assumption and conjecture. And i certainly don't think I deserve a good bang because I have been nice to a ladyfriend. Way to go asshole.
 
yo get off his dick he didnt say anything like "i want to get sex cause im nice!"

in unrelated news high school dating has its own problems, aka anal parents not letting me date their children. happened twice in six months like what the hell.
 
ehhh, she's suckin your dick, you owe her a little bit
at least be a cunning linguist


edit: probably alone in this, but is anybody else underwhelmed with blowjobs?
edit2: in before "you probably haven't had a good blowjob", that's not the fuckin problem (BAN ME PLEASE)

I too, am also very underwhelmed by blow jobs. I've had a lot, but honestly the best it gets is with a long time girlfriend with whom you have open dialogue about what's good. Even then, I've never cum as a result of a blow job.

Titty fucks are potentially a lot better-- but even then, you can't really get a good one unless the girl has at least a 36DD bust. If you've never had a good titty fuck from a girl with an F+ cup (ENVELOPED, holy shit, I can just see the tip of my dick), you don't know what I am talking about when I say "size matters" here.


A lot of people say girls like to be eaten out, but from my experience, I could always stimulate girls a lot more with the finger than the tongue-- the finger moves more rapidly. If I want to get a girl off quick (or she wants to get off), just finger to the clit.
 
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^That's a whole lot of assumption and conjecture. And i certainly don't think I deserve a good bang because I have been nice to a ladyfriend. Way to go asshole.

They are conjecture, but based on the general use of the word friendzone and, you know, describing women wanting to be friends with you instead of dates as a terrible affliction. I heard Stalin used that shit as a form of torture. Also this charming little quote.

and GOD-FUCKING-DAMMNIT I wanna get laid. It's about GODDAMN time. I tell you man, women are like the little she-devils who'll suck you dry (not a blowjob pun) and leave you to die. I had to waste a shitton of cash taking my ex out and SHE FUCKING DUMPS ME... tells me that 'I always knew this wouldn't work out'... IF YOU KNEW THAT YOU BITCH WHY DID YOU START DATING ME ANYWAYS? YOU ASSHOLE

Seriously though, what were you hoping to get out of this? How to force women to find you dateable? How to make them not want to be friends with you if they don't want to date you? This isn't the complaints thread, and the word friendzone tends to imply that friendship with women is just the most awful thing ever or that you're owed something other than friendship if you want it. TL;DR: Friendzone discussion is shit and if you want advice, ask for something specific and don't use such a stupid ass word that implies some really fucking negative things about how you view relationships (platonic or otherwise) with women.
 
I was getting over a bad breakup, and that was a rant. And I meant every word, because the relationship I was in went borderline abusive. The sex but was made a big deal out of because I really thought we were going somewhere, after giving her the benefit of doubt that maybe she is insecure/going through a phase/conflicted etc, and we're just back on track again for a month and suddenly out of the blue one fine day she texts me that she's 'found someone else'. Now I'm not a lecherous dick or anything, but when you're dating someone for 1+ years you have certain expectations. It's only natural you should have them.
Good job quoting a month(s?) old text.

If you correlate everyone's online rants with their irl behavior almost everyone will turn out to be horrible.

The only thing I'm looking for if are there any certain subconscious behavior traits people fall into that make it hard for women to make themselves approachable. I have been having a really hard time since that break-up. I'm not a chick repellent or anything. They are comfortable around me, we hang out and all, and I even call them up/they call me up and chat etc. I just seem to have lost the knack of making a romantic approach, it's not as much as 'they friendzoned me', as much as 'I am getting myself friendzoned.'
 
Obviously it was a rant. But you know, even you can probably see why it comes off as 'I put so much money in but no sex is coming out! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS IM SUPPOSED TO BE GETTING SEX FUCK YOU BITCH YOU CANT LEAVE UNTIL I GET SOME, I PAID FOR IT!!!' No matter how long you were going out for, she doesn't owe you sex. Obviously if you have differing expectations on the issue it's reasonable to break up over them, though. If the relationship was abusive then it's probably a good thing you guys broke up, though I am a little curious why your rant would basically be all about the sex you weren't getting in light of that. Was it only something you realised in retrospect?

Anyway I can't really help with the romance stuff myself, beyond some generic "be direct" advice. Sounds like you might need some more healing time due to your past relationship before you'll really be ready for a new one, though, if making a romantic approach is hard for you now. /shrug
 
I don't really understand the friendzone, I imagine that most of the women I know regard me as 'just a friend,' but I'm not upset by this. As for dating at university I advise:

1. Know that you'll probably have more fun when you aren't preoccupied by your romantic situation. I've gone to many parties that have more or less explicit romantic/sexual themes (ABC parties, "wedding" parties, etc) and I find that there is always someone who can't have fun at these parties unless they're hooking up with someone. They come to the party expecting the entire thing to facilitate them getting laid, and they can't have fun without that. Go to a lot of activities during your first year, but don't have expectations. Expectations are the nemesis of enjoying yourself during new experiences.

2. Most of the relationships you'll be in during uni are going to be shitty or flawed to the extent that they'll unravel in less than 6 months.

3. On approaching people: You have to be direct and obvious/clear. People are massive cowards when it comes to putting themselves out there in general, and further they are pretty adept at tricking themselves into believing that another person isn't interested in them. All the time there are people that like each other, but manage to fuck it up with their own respective fears of being rejected. People don't realize that if they didn't have so much dumbness/weirdness/pride/stigma/anxiety about approaching people/being approached it would be so much easier to get laid. At a certain point I just think to myself "look at these dumb bitches, if they didn't hold so much nonsense they could be having sex with each other right now."
 
Obviously it was a rant. But you know, even you can probably see why it comes off as 'I put so much money in but no sex is coming out! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS IM SUPPOSED TO BE GETTING SEX FUCK YOU BITCH YOU CANT LEAVE UNTIL I GET SOME, I PAID FOR IT!!!'

The money bit wasn't related to the sex bit, you're drawing all the wrong lines here. When you get into a mature relationship, sooner or later you anticipate that. Everyone does. Remember I'm talking about a whole year here. You don't start dating people to play ludo with them. I'll just leave it at that.
 
the friend zone does exist, but that's only the term guys use to describe it because they are being shallow and focusing on sex. The friend zone simply is a girl just wanting to be friends with a guy, but the guy wants more out of it than she does. This is what happens when people are not up front and honest about their intentions, and their attempted sneakiness backfires on them.

Seriously, if you just tell people what you want from the beginning you'll waste less time. You might get more immediate rejections, but you certainly won't have a problem with being friend zoned. If you get friend zoned, it's your own damn fault for trying to be Mr. Slick.
 
the friend zone does exist, but that's only the term guys use to describe it because they are being shallow and focusing on sex. The friend zone simply is a girl just wanting to be friends with a guy, but the guy wants more out of it than she does. This is what happens when people are not up front and honest about their intentions, and their attempted sneakiness backfires on them.

Seriously, if you just tell people what you want from the beginning you'll waste less time. You might get more immediate rejections, but you certainly won't have a problem with being friend zoned. If you get friend zoned, it's your own damn fault for trying to be Mr. Slick.

THANK YOU. You seem to be the only guy that realises this.
 
Situation 1: you approach someone with sex in mind, and get rejected. Relationship ends. No need to get upset.

Situation 2: you are close friends with someone for a great deal of time, then attempt to take things to the next level, and get rejected. Quit complaining about being friendzoned, you should be greatful that you at least have a friendly relationship with somebody. I've been in this situation, I tried dating a close friend (sort of), it didn't work, and now we're still friends five years later. No complaining.

Situation 3: you approach a woman with sex in mind, try to date her, she agrees, then constantly puts you off but still expects you to treat her well, then says she doesn't see a romantic relationship "but that doesn't mean you can't stop going out with me and helping me with my problems!". Complaining justified? Yes. It's partially your fault for getting led along by somebody manipulative, though. Wise up to these people and don't get in these situations (I'm pretty sure this happens the least amount compared to the others and is the only time somebody should ever be allowed to bitch about "teh friendzone")
 
Hmm, although I agree with the general sentiment about the friendzone not existing, you do have to remember that there are cases where you start out being friends with someone, and it eventually develops into something more for you, but not for them.

But when you start talking to someone for like three days and then ask them out and they say they'd rather be friends, it doesn't mean you've been friendzoned, it means you've been politely rejected and you can either just leave because there's no chance of the sexy, or just value people for more than their vagina.

Source: sexual experience limited to own extremities but is a fucking amazing matchmaker
 
Hmm, although I agree with the general sentiment about the friendzone not existing, you do have to remember that there are cases where you start out being friends with someone, and it eventually develops into something more for you, but not for them.

But when you start talking to someone for like three days and then ask them out and they say they'd rather be friends, it doesn't mean you've been friendzoned, it means you've been politely rejected and you can either just leave because there's no chance of the sexy, or just value people for more than their vagina.

Source: sexual experience limited to own extremities but is a fucking amazing matchmaker

Well, from my experience the people bitching about being friendzoned are generally the "you start talking to someone for like three days and then ask them out and they say they'd rather be friends" type. If you start out being friends, and it eventually blossoms into something more for you, you've probably got an amazing friendship going already, one that's unlikely to end just because you asked them out, a friendship like that is arguably better than a sexual relationship anyway, and you have nothing to complain about.
 
It was perfect lol, but it seems soo soon.

Just tell him you don't want to go fast nicely. What you don't want to happen is a week from now him expecting sex and you being like "no it's way too early" and he's like "but I kissed you on day 1 and then made out with you on day 3 etc. etc. and you were fine with it!!" The last thing you want is to be forced into something you don't want to be just because you're afraid of telling him to go slowly. If he actually is into you he'll wait a while.

In other news though, grats on the perfect first kiss ;) <3
 
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