Pearls o' Wisdom

[Myzozoa]

There is no cure for stupidity (ばかにつけるくするわない）

Even monkeys fall from trees (fuck if i remember how to say this one)

Food is more important than flowers (花よりだんご）

 

[Acklow]

Some more random ones:

There are no short cuts to any place worth going.

Virginity like bubble, one prick all gone.

Many complain of their looks, but none of their brains.

Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.

 

[Sæglópur]

If I tell you a rooster can pull a buggy then hitch'em up

There's no proof in the pudding

and...

Fool me once, shame on you
Fool me twice, shame on me

 

[Fatecrashers]

There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again

 

[Woodchuck]

don't throw grass at stoned mouses

 

[Chill Murray]

if at first you don't succeed, skydiving is probably not for you

 

[Darkaxis]

Al que madruga Dios lo ayuda!

The one who wakes up early has God's blessing

Camaron que se duerme se lo lleva la corriente.

You snooze you lose.

A caballo regalado no se le busca colmillo.

Gifted horse dont change it.

 

[min min]

"Then the liars and swearers are fools,
for there are liars and swearers enow to beat
the honest men and hang up them."

--Macduff's Son

quote from Macbeth.

 

[v]

proverbs of my (drunken) father
"son, if you have to do something bad, don't do it out of love or whatever. do it because you're drunk and the patriots lost"

"if you find a girl who will blow you while you're taking shots, marry her"

"jimi hendrix choked to death on his own vomit. son, none of us are much better than jimi"

"if you get too good at something, you die. it happened to jesus, john lennon, jimi hendrix, and everyone who got good at living a long time."

"either you win or you cheat. that's it."

"son, it's not the size that matters. it's the size relative to the woman. your mother is five feet tall and asian, so no matter what i'm huge."

"never bring a gun to a knife fight. bring your car."

"a car is the only weapon a man needs"

"they say friends don't let friends drive drunk, but i say try and stop me"

"if you only learn one thing from me, son, it's that you can't always follow your dreams. i wanted a space station, you want a country. it's not practical settle for something small, like a jetpack made of guns or something. a superman robot. there's literally a billion other, less retarded things"

"the wisest man is the one who has had the most scotch"

proverbs of my mother
"if you ever stop reading, you become retarded. it's just a fact"

"if you insult dead people they'll come and haunt you all the time"

 

[min min]

Your dad sounds epic :o

 

[Dan Dan]

your dad is the wisest man.

 

[Mekkah]

,,a man that goes for treasure,goes to help the poor people''

 

[mixmaster.mewthree]

"When you're at rock bottom, there are more things you can do than go up. You can grow, shrink, morph into a horrible disfigured face with a bullet making a unibrow, go left, go right, take pills all night. Nobody cares. Or, you can fight... Destroy what destroys you" - Chris Brown

 

[az]

,,i like your cow,brother, but is to expensive''

 

[Chill Murray]

,,you battle, you fucker the beacth"

 

[darkie]

...you can't get fooled again

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

[Charro]

"Around the World, around the World, around the World"

French Proverb

 

[Steamroll]

"Build a better mousetrap, and the world will beat a path to your door." - Tom & Jerry

 

[His Eminence Lord Poppington II]

i hope to god you're not serious charro lol