I want to be a Walrus

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Captain Apollo

Captain Apollo

Hello, I am currently 15 years old and I want to become a walrus. I know there’s a million people out there just like me, but I promise you I’m different. On December 14th, I’m moving to Antartica; home of the greatest walruses. I’ve already cut off my arms, and now slide on my stomach everywhere I go as training. I may not be a walrus yet, but I promise you if you give me a chance and the support I need, I will become the greatest walrus.
 
Jealous much? Just because you aren't walrusey doesn't mean you can be a hater to those who have actually followed there dreams and those who are walruses. Do not hate me because I am a walrus. Support my quest for total walrus domination.
 
I feel ya, brah.

I stuck a drill in my head in the pursuit of narwhal-dom.

Dream on, my friend. Dream on.
 
I assure you I am much handsomer than that abomination. At mating season all the females will flock to me and my marvelous tusks. Speaking of tusks that is what I am typing with until my prosthetic flippers come in.
 
yes at WalrusFest they play that song and me and my Walrus friends sing and dance. It wasn't until recently I noticed that those so called "Beatles" were mocking walrus-kind. Not once has me or a friend ever uttered goo-goo ga joob, which is actually baby language for give me the food and has nothing to do with walruses. No at WalrusFest '13 we will burn magical mystery tour albums.
 
So where do you and your walrus friends currently live?

Also, do you have any walrus friends that you want to mate with?
 
Thank goodness for this thread. I was worrying that the quality of the threads in the forum was decreasing. *whew* But honestly, how do you type without your arms?
 
also the OP sucks dick so this thread is now about which would win: wilford brimley with unlimited insulin shots or a bus-sized walrus that can breathe on land
 
blitzlefan said:
Thank goodness for this thread. I was worrying that the quality of the threads in the forum was decreasing. *whew* But honestly, how do you type without your arms?
Click to expand...

you mean you've never typed with your nose and/or feet? shame.

who the fuck is wilford brimley.
 
golurk.jpg

250px-Smores-Microwave.jpg
 
if brimley injects all of the insulin at once, he'll probably swell up and explode, taking out the walrus with him and probably several small fishing villages too
 
This thread is about my pilgrimage to Antarctica all you newfags and hipsters can suck my big black walrus dick because this threat is about my pledge to the Democratic Walrus Republic of Korea. If you cant handle it then you can shove it.
 
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