
What is Walrus? It's a forum game where you submit songs to me according to various categories and I rank and score them based on how much I like them.
Also, this time the categories are inspired by Watsky songs because Watsky stone cold bop.
To join, simply sign up in this thread (or drop me a DM at BrainpanSonata#0280). Submissions must be done by PM/DM, including YouTube or Soundcloud links to your picks. One by one, categories will be revealed in the official walrus Discord server and the respective threads. Aim for the highest overall score, or play along for fun and the love of music.
Scores will be logged and tracked via Google spreadsheet. Scoring is done on a 0.0-10.0 points range based on how much I enjoy a song and how well it fits the respective category. My scoring system runs along the same lines as MyAnimeList: 5s are boring, 6s are okay, 7s are good, 8s are great, 9s are awesome, and if you get a 4 or below ya dun goofed. Will anyone send me a 10 point masterpiece? We’ll see...
Additional rules are as follows:
- Any categories you fail to submit for will automatically be scored 0. You can send submissions at any point up to the day before the respective category’s scheduled reveal. In some cases, depending on my schedule, I may be lenient enough to accept submissions up to the T-minus 12 hours mark. I will actively check in with players who have unfilled submissions to help prevent catfails.
- Any submissions which don't fit the qualifying requirements of their respective category will automatically be scored 0. For example, if I had a category about guitars and you subbed an acapella song, you would catfail.
- You will need to change your submission if it's a song I judged in my previous walruses in the exact same category that you submit it for. This rule only applies to the cover songs category Sloppy Seconds. Subbing a previously judged song for a different category is okay, since judging factors will change based on which category it’s submitted to.
- You will need to change your submission if it's a song I submitted to a previous walrus.
- You will need to change your submission if it's a song I used as an example, header, or outro in this walrus or my previous walruses.
- Tracking for rules 3, 4, and 5 is solely the responsibility of the host. I will crosscheck all submissions and let you know if something needs to be changed. I will also let you know of any technical errors which might require you to change the links to your submissions.
- You will need to change your submission if I can't bring myself to listen to it in its entirety more than once. This pertains not just to the banlist found in Rule 10, but also to anything pitch shifted/chipmunked, played on a kazoo/vuvuzela/air horn, and/or painfully out of tune. If you value scoring high on the leaderboard, then this is not the hill you die on.
- If two or more players submit the same song for a category, the second (and third and so on) person to submit the song will be given the option to change their submission. If they decide to stick with it, it will be given a single score and the players involved will tie in that round's rankings. This type of tie will be expressed in dense ranking (eg. 1223) rather than standard competition ranking (eg. 1224).
- You can change your submissions at your leisure. As with late submissions, song changes will be accepted at any point up to the day before the respective category’s reveal. Unlike Rule 1, I will not accept T-12 hour sub swaps because getting in a song that may do better or worse isn’t as urgent as avoiding a 0.
- My ban list is Nickelback, Owl City, Operation Ivy, The Neighbourhood, Kings of Leon, and US band Backlash. Swedish band Backlash is okay, but I have too many issues with that trumped up Pink Floyd cover band by the same name.
- You cannot submit Watsky to the Watsky walrus because that is too easy and you’d probably be sending me something I’m using here or have subbed in the past.
Pale Kid Raps Fast
Gimme something with a BPM rate of 120 or more. Faster is not necessarily better, but anything that sounds or feels like a slow jam will probably not do well here. I’ll be checking qualifiers with https://songbpm.com and https://getsongbpm.com/tempo, so feel free to use those when picking your sub.
Examples:
Mean Ass Drunk by Watsky [154 bpm]
Nuclear (Album Version) by Zomboy [174 bpm]
Sloppy Seconds
This one's for the hand-me-downs: cover songs. Yes, it’s the return of my favorite category. Rules 3, 4, and 5 apply here, so check below for a list of covers songs I have already judged, used, and/or subbed. Also, the “I’ve judged, used, and/or subbed this” list stands at a whopping 54 songs, so I’m gonna save myself some trouble and say anything labeled as a remix does not qualify.
Examples:
The Pretender by Infected Mushroom
Take On Me by PelleK
Don’t Be Nice
Diss tracks are a thing, right? Send me some.This stands to be a narrow category, so I will also allow songs that hate on a general subject rather than specific individuals.
Examples:
Kill A Hipster by Watsky ft. Chinaka Hodge & Andrew Oedel
Mama Said Knock You Out by LL Cool J
Lovely Thing Suite
Send me a song that’s about death in some way, shape, or form. Whether it’s hypothetical musings, mourning someone who passed, or a description of how someone died, anything goes. Though maybe keep it classy; respect the dead and all that.
Examples:
Lovely Thing Suite: Conversations by Watsky
I Will Follow You Into The Dark by Death Cab for Cutie
Limo 4 Emos
After all that hate and death, I need something that’ll “pick you up when you are down”. So send me cheery, funny, and/or motivational songs to lift my mood. Bouncy music with depressing/disturbing lyrics is not what I’m looking for here. I want something truly feelgood.
Examples:
Feeling Good by Muse
Moral Of The Story by Watsky
Headphones
You know what headphones are great for? Stereophonic effects. A riff in one ear, a chord in the other, a beat that pingpongs back and forth in your skull. So send me something that grabs my audiospatial attention.
These examples are best understood through headphones:
Fireworks by Watsky
On The Run by Pink Floyd
The Legend of Hardhead Ned
Whether it’s a true story, bro or the tallest of tall tales, send me a song where the lyrics tell a story. If this walrus gets 20 or more people submitting, I will include an exclusive uncensored bonus header song in this category’s reveal.
Examples:
The Devil Went Down To Georgia by The Charlie Daniels Band
Stan by Eminem ft. Dido
Let’s Get High And Watch Planet Earth
We’ve done booze before, so let’s do drugs now. Uh, songs about drugs. I am not ready to handle a bigass byo kush meet and greet and I probably never will be.
Examples:
Feel Good Hit of the Summer by Queens Of The Stone Age
Jack I’m Mellow by Trixie Smith
Gimme something with a BPM rate of 120 or more. Faster is not necessarily better, but anything that sounds or feels like a slow jam will probably not do well here. I’ll be checking qualifiers with https://songbpm.com and https://getsongbpm.com/tempo, so feel free to use those when picking your sub.
Examples:
Mean Ass Drunk by Watsky [154 bpm]
Nuclear (Album Version) by Zomboy [174 bpm]
Sloppy Seconds
This one's for the hand-me-downs: cover songs. Yes, it’s the return of my favorite category. Rules 3, 4, and 5 apply here, so check below for a list of covers songs I have already judged, used, and/or subbed. Also, the “I’ve judged, used, and/or subbed this” list stands at a whopping 54 songs, so I’m gonna save myself some trouble and say anything labeled as a remix does not qualify.
Examples:
The Pretender by Infected Mushroom
Take On Me by PelleK
Don’t Be Nice
Diss tracks are a thing, right? Send me some.This stands to be a narrow category, so I will also allow songs that hate on a general subject rather than specific individuals.
Examples:
Kill A Hipster by Watsky ft. Chinaka Hodge & Andrew Oedel
Mama Said Knock You Out by LL Cool J
Lovely Thing Suite
Send me a song that’s about death in some way, shape, or form. Whether it’s hypothetical musings, mourning someone who passed, or a description of how someone died, anything goes. Though maybe keep it classy; respect the dead and all that.
Examples:
Lovely Thing Suite: Conversations by Watsky
I Will Follow You Into The Dark by Death Cab for Cutie
Limo 4 Emos
After all that hate and death, I need something that’ll “pick you up when you are down”. So send me cheery, funny, and/or motivational songs to lift my mood. Bouncy music with depressing/disturbing lyrics is not what I’m looking for here. I want something truly feelgood.
Examples:
Feeling Good by Muse
Moral Of The Story by Watsky
Headphones
You know what headphones are great for? Stereophonic effects. A riff in one ear, a chord in the other, a beat that pingpongs back and forth in your skull. So send me something that grabs my audiospatial attention.
These examples are best understood through headphones:
Fireworks by Watsky
On The Run by Pink Floyd
The Legend of Hardhead Ned
Whether it’s a true story, bro or the tallest of tall tales, send me a song where the lyrics tell a story. If this walrus gets 20 or more people submitting, I will include an exclusive uncensored bonus header song in this category’s reveal.
Examples:
The Devil Went Down To Georgia by The Charlie Daniels Band
Stan by Eminem ft. Dido
Let’s Get High And Watch Planet Earth
We’ve done booze before, so let’s do drugs now. Uh, songs about drugs. I am not ready to handle a bigass byo kush meet and greet and I probably never will be.
Examples:
Feel Good Hit of the Summer by Queens Of The Stone Age
Jack I’m Mellow by Trixie Smith
The following is a list of cover songs from my first walrus and my own subs.
As per Rule 3, these songs cannot be subbed for Sloppy Seconds.
Black Hole Sun by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Haley Reinhart
Come Together by Arctic Monkeys
Down Under by PelleK
Renegades of Funk by Rage Against The Machine
Pepper Steak piano version by rireetheviridan
Young Folks by James Blunt
Oops I Did It Again! By Children of Bodom
Mighty Quinn (Quinn the Eskimo) by Manfred Mann (This actually is a cover song)
Footloose by Blake Shelton
Never Gonna Give You Up... KAZOO’d! By Tsuko G.
Cha-La Head-Cha-La by FLOW
Stay by Demi Lovato
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road by Sara Bareilles
You’re Wondering Now by Amy Winehouse ft. The Specials
Ta Shuo by Zhang Bi Chen
Bad Apple!! By Demetori
Village Green Preservation Society by Kate Rusby
Do I Wanna Know? By CHVRCHES
I Won’t Back Down by Johnny Cash
I Dreamed A Dream by Idina Menzel and Lea Michele
Shake The Disease by Hooverphonic
Lake of Fire by Nirvana
Defying Gravity by Caleb Hyles
Shelter (Ghibli Orchestra Edition) by The Seycara Orchestra
Billie Jean by Chris Cornell
Take On Me by Brooklyn Duo and Ensemble Connect
Royals by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Puddles Pity Party
This Will Be Our Year by OK Go
Viva Las Vegas by Dead Kennedys
Poor Unfortunate Souls by Jonathan Young
The Final Countdown by Jonathan Young and Caleb Hyles
Jolene by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Maris
Mr. Heatmiser by Big Bad Voodoo Daddy
The Sound of Silence by Disturbed
Thriller by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Wayne Brady
Hallelujah by Alexandra Burke
Blue Monday (1930s instruments version) by Orkestra Obsolete
Climbing Up The Walls by Easy Star All-Stars ft. Tamar-kali
The Man Who Sold The World by Nirvana
The Handler by PelleK
Baby I'm Yours by Arctic Monkeys
Bloody Stream by PelleK
Classical Gas by Tommy Emmanuel
Somebody That I Used To Know by Jonathan Young
White Christmas Acapella Cover by Jonathan Young
Senbonzakura Metal Ruler Version by Unknown Artist ft. Hatsune Miku
Red Dwarf Theme on Laser Harp by Theremin Hero
Vamo' Alla Flamenco by The Black Mages
Stormy Weather by Ella Fitzgerald
Take On Me by Ninja Sex Party
I’m Not Okay (I Promise) by Caleb Hyles
No Surprises by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Chloe Feoranzo
Hit The Road Jack by Tommy Emmanuel & Igor Presnyakov
Whatever Lola Wants by Della Reese
What Is Love by Skameleon
I Will Survive by Cake
As per Rule 3, these songs cannot be subbed for Sloppy Seconds.
Black Hole Sun by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Haley Reinhart
Come Together by Arctic Monkeys
Down Under by PelleK
Renegades of Funk by Rage Against The Machine
Pepper Steak piano version by rireetheviridan
Young Folks by James Blunt
Oops I Did It Again! By Children of Bodom
Mighty Quinn (Quinn the Eskimo) by Manfred Mann (This actually is a cover song)
Footloose by Blake Shelton
Never Gonna Give You Up... KAZOO’d! By Tsuko G.
Cha-La Head-Cha-La by FLOW
Stay by Demi Lovato
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road by Sara Bareilles
You’re Wondering Now by Amy Winehouse ft. The Specials
Ta Shuo by Zhang Bi Chen
Bad Apple!! By Demetori
Village Green Preservation Society by Kate Rusby
Do I Wanna Know? By CHVRCHES
I Won’t Back Down by Johnny Cash
I Dreamed A Dream by Idina Menzel and Lea Michele
Shake The Disease by Hooverphonic
Lake of Fire by Nirvana
Defying Gravity by Caleb Hyles
Shelter (Ghibli Orchestra Edition) by The Seycara Orchestra
Billie Jean by Chris Cornell
Take On Me by Brooklyn Duo and Ensemble Connect
Royals by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Puddles Pity Party
This Will Be Our Year by OK Go
Viva Las Vegas by Dead Kennedys
Poor Unfortunate Souls by Jonathan Young
The Final Countdown by Jonathan Young and Caleb Hyles
Jolene by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Maris
Mr. Heatmiser by Big Bad Voodoo Daddy
The Sound of Silence by Disturbed
Thriller by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Wayne Brady
Hallelujah by Alexandra Burke
Blue Monday (1930s instruments version) by Orkestra Obsolete
Climbing Up The Walls by Easy Star All-Stars ft. Tamar-kali
The Man Who Sold The World by Nirvana
The Handler by PelleK
Baby I'm Yours by Arctic Monkeys
Bloody Stream by PelleK
Classical Gas by Tommy Emmanuel
Somebody That I Used To Know by Jonathan Young
White Christmas Acapella Cover by Jonathan Young
Senbonzakura Metal Ruler Version by Unknown Artist ft. Hatsune Miku
Red Dwarf Theme on Laser Harp by Theremin Hero
Vamo' Alla Flamenco by The Black Mages
Stormy Weather by Ella Fitzgerald
Take On Me by Ninja Sex Party
I’m Not Okay (I Promise) by Caleb Hyles
No Surprises by Postmodern Jukebox ft. Chloe Feoranzo
Hit The Road Jack by Tommy Emmanuel & Igor Presnyakov
Whatever Lola Wants by Della Reese
What Is Love by Skameleon
I Will Survive by Cake
Signups List
- leonard (from big bang theory) [Smogon]
- BLOODYRAIN10001 [Kongregate]
- nikeas [Kongregate]
- Celever [Smogon]
- Andy Snype [Smogon]
- Lebossle [Kongregate]
- Aladyyn [Smogon]
- Da Letter El [Smogon]
- Robert Alfons [Smogon]
- nutella [Mafia Universe]
- shubaka17 [Smogon]
- Mischief [Mafia Universe]
- Owner Of A Lonely Heart [Mafia Universe]
- Phighter [Mafia Universe]
- LordQuas [Mafia Universe]
- JALMONT [Smogon]
- RaceBandit [Kongregate]
- Isa [Smogon]
- Energy [Smogon]
- Maybe you?
Additionally, I'd like your opinion about header songs. My original plan was to do the songs the categories were named after as headers, with just one header and an outro per reveal. If you would like the usual two headers, speak up in your signup post.
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