Anybody else eat Count Chocula cereal as a kid? Nobody? Just me?
Ok, well...back in the cursed days of the 2000s, cereal boxes were obsessed with packing in little goodies and stuff to attract unaware children to beg their parents to buy it. You could get pens, toys, and even video games. I got the entire collection of backyard sports out of general mills cereal. What was the endgame here? I have no idea. The machinations of the General Mills executive board to take over all of america go beyond my primitive brain. Well, whatever our overlords desire of us is irrelevant. What is relevant is that Count Chocula cereal boxes included a pack-in music CD containing the spooky, haunting, FUN sounds of halloween! I have no idea where this idea came from...but I CAN tell you that this CD is a certified hood classic.
Without any further ado, let's celebrate the spookiest day of the year in the best way we can: with an irrelevant tier list!
You should check out this CD, btw, it slaps.
Count Chocula Intro
Ooh, you think that sounded spooky! Just wait.... in a moment, you'll be hearing the creepy, haunting, fun sounds of Halloween! But first, let me introduce myself. My name is Count Chocula, and I love anything spooky! Like Frankenberry, Boo-berry, and Count Chocula cereals! Now, grab a spoon, pour yourself a bowl, sit back, and try not to be too afraid... because the spooky sounds of Halloween are about to begin!
It's Spooky In Here
This next track comes to us courtesy of the Baha Men (of "Who Let the Dogs Out?" fame). As a child, I did not understand why they keep talking about Digimon, but I only later learned that this was recorded as a tie-in with a Digimon Halloween special. Now that we've got that out of the way, let's move on to why this track is rated highly: it fucking slaps, that's why. A slick mix of techno sound effects, great backing vocals, and a groovy beat. These guys have mad flow, too. Gotta get back to the Digiworld cause Digimon don't get scared.
Fox Family Halloween Countdown
I guess there was some kind of Fox Family TV show about Halloween? Anyway, this track is pretty good, it has a lot more of the silliness factor than the other tracks listed (or, at least the ones that are rated highly, but... we'll get to the rest later). It's very fitting as the intro to the album, but not much more to say beyond that. WELCOME TO THE COUNTDOWN!!
Halloween Overture
As a kid, I thought this song was awesome. Listening to it again... man, this thing is just way too silly. There's banjo in there. To this day I don't know if this is a custom song recorded for this CD or if it's from some other more obscure media. It's very "OK".
Big Wolf On Campus Theme
This song really is out of place. I guess the only thing vaguely related is that werewolves are scary? I know next to nothing about this show, but it seems like some kind of Teen Wolf Ripoff. In fact until today I thought this song WAS the teen wolf theme. The theme is ok, really, it's just really short. How can you unironically put a 30 second song on this album?
The Kids from Room 402 Halloween Theme
Ok, so more obscure media. Canadian animated show, this time. Apparently this show ran for five years? And had 52 episodes? The song is very narrative driven. I think it has the voices of Count Chocula singing here? So it actually tells some kind of story, but it just isn't that appealing. It doesn't even sound that groovy either. Pass
It's Spooky In Here (Junkanoo Mix)
A song so good, they put it on the CD twice! Or so it would seem. This version of the song remained a mystery to me as a child, but careful listeners were able to pinpoint that this version cut out the backing vocals from the track, instantly making it much worse. Don't listen to this. Just listen to the original.
Angela Anaconda: Boo! I Scared You!
Oh boy, have we hit rock bottom. This song is annoying as fuck. It was annoying as a kid and it's annoying now. MORE obscure lost media from Canada. What the hell were the Canadians doing in the early 2000s? All I know about Angela Anaconda lore is this greentext. If it's anything to go by, this girl's powers are not to be trifled with. Listen at your own risk.
The Sounds of Halloween
They aren't even that scary
Thanks for listening. I can't believe I have devoted so much of my precious memory to a fucking cereal commercial. If you are like me and enjoy this CD, you can download it for yourself here. Bless the archivists of 2000s culture. Count Chocula 4 Lyfe!
Ok, well...back in the cursed days of the 2000s, cereal boxes were obsessed with packing in little goodies and stuff to attract unaware children to beg their parents to buy it. You could get pens, toys, and even video games. I got the entire collection of backyard sports out of general mills cereal. What was the endgame here? I have no idea. The machinations of the General Mills executive board to take over all of america go beyond my primitive brain. Well, whatever our overlords desire of us is irrelevant. What is relevant is that Count Chocula cereal boxes included a pack-in music CD containing the spooky, haunting, FUN sounds of halloween! I have no idea where this idea came from...but I CAN tell you that this CD is a certified hood classic.
Without any further ado, let's celebrate the spookiest day of the year in the best way we can: with an irrelevant tier list!
You should check out this CD, btw, it slaps.
Count Chocula Intro
Ooh, you think that sounded spooky! Just wait.... in a moment, you'll be hearing the creepy, haunting, fun sounds of Halloween! But first, let me introduce myself. My name is Count Chocula, and I love anything spooky! Like Frankenberry, Boo-berry, and Count Chocula cereals! Now, grab a spoon, pour yourself a bowl, sit back, and try not to be too afraid... because the spooky sounds of Halloween are about to begin!
It's Spooky In Here
This next track comes to us courtesy of the Baha Men (of "Who Let the Dogs Out?" fame). As a child, I did not understand why they keep talking about Digimon, but I only later learned that this was recorded as a tie-in with a Digimon Halloween special. Now that we've got that out of the way, let's move on to why this track is rated highly: it fucking slaps, that's why. A slick mix of techno sound effects, great backing vocals, and a groovy beat. These guys have mad flow, too. Gotta get back to the Digiworld cause Digimon don't get scared.
Fox Family Halloween Countdown
I guess there was some kind of Fox Family TV show about Halloween? Anyway, this track is pretty good, it has a lot more of the silliness factor than the other tracks listed (or, at least the ones that are rated highly, but... we'll get to the rest later). It's very fitting as the intro to the album, but not much more to say beyond that. WELCOME TO THE COUNTDOWN!!
Halloween Overture
As a kid, I thought this song was awesome. Listening to it again... man, this thing is just way too silly. There's banjo in there. To this day I don't know if this is a custom song recorded for this CD or if it's from some other more obscure media. It's very "OK".
Big Wolf On Campus Theme
This song really is out of place. I guess the only thing vaguely related is that werewolves are scary? I know next to nothing about this show, but it seems like some kind of Teen Wolf Ripoff. In fact until today I thought this song WAS the teen wolf theme. The theme is ok, really, it's just really short. How can you unironically put a 30 second song on this album?
The Kids from Room 402 Halloween Theme
Ok, so more obscure media. Canadian animated show, this time. Apparently this show ran for five years? And had 52 episodes? The song is very narrative driven. I think it has the voices of Count Chocula singing here? So it actually tells some kind of story, but it just isn't that appealing. It doesn't even sound that groovy either. Pass
It's Spooky In Here (Junkanoo Mix)
A song so good, they put it on the CD twice! Or so it would seem. This version of the song remained a mystery to me as a child, but careful listeners were able to pinpoint that this version cut out the backing vocals from the track, instantly making it much worse. Don't listen to this. Just listen to the original.
Angela Anaconda: Boo! I Scared You!
Oh boy, have we hit rock bottom. This song is annoying as fuck. It was annoying as a kid and it's annoying now. MORE obscure lost media from Canada. What the hell were the Canadians doing in the early 2000s? All I know about Angela Anaconda lore is this greentext. If it's anything to go by, this girl's powers are not to be trifled with. Listen at your own risk.
The Sounds of Halloween
They aren't even that scary
Thanks for listening. I can't believe I have devoted so much of my precious memory to a fucking cereal commercial. If you are like me and enjoy this CD, you can download it for yourself here. Bless the archivists of 2000s culture. Count Chocula 4 Lyfe!
