Hi! There are a few things regarding Pokemon both in the games and in competitive that I always found either amusing or totally senseless. I know that GameFreak's logic doesn't always make sense and it doesn't necessarily have to in order to make good games or give us a good competitive metagame, but I wanted to possibly try my hand at highlighting a few of these things in a joke, or "entertainment", article. ♥
Some of the things I want to highlight are as follows:
Moves
Diglett and Dugtrio learn Slash, Aerial Ace, and Sucker Punch, but what exactly are they attacking with? If it is assumed that their claws or whatever are hidden underground, why do we never see them? Why does the dirt seem to enter the Poke Ball with them and surround them again when they are sent out? It's also interesting that the dirt flies with them across the screen when any of the aforementioned attacks are used, and then they return to their original sprite animation with the surrounding dirt appearing completely undisturbed.
Wingull learns Shock Wave, but is 4x weak to Electric. How does it create the energy needed to use this attack without severely hurting itself in the process?
Kyurem cannot learn Frost Breath, when literally every other Ice-type can. Why is the ultimate Ice Pokemon left out?
Hitmonchan cannot learn Sucker Punch, but Hitmonlee and Hitmontop can. Even though Sucker Punch means "Surprise Attack" in literal translation from Japanese, it's still weird that the other two Tyrogue evolutions get a move with Punch in the name, but the punching-based evolution doesn't.
Shroomish learns Drain Punch and Focus Punch, but has no means of using the moves in any logical sense. It has no hands, hand-like appendages, or even arms, making the use of these attacks physically impossible.
Dive is usable in battle in non-aquatic environments, where there is no water to dive into. This includes roads and forests... But what about buildings? What about volcanic places? LOL
Shedinja has access to Final Gambit, dealing a whopping 1 HP worth of damage to the foe before sacrificing itself in the process.
Rhydon and Rhyperior are able to use Surf, but are 4x weak to Water. In-game it makes no sense that it should be able to knowingly and directly immerse itself into something it's deathly weak to without some kind of consequence.
Pidgey learns Fly, but is 1 foot tall and weighs 4 pounds. If this is to be used in-game at all, how does it carry the player to different towns throughout a given region? There's no way it can support the weight of a 10-year old human being, and if someone tried to grab onto its feet to fly with it, it would never get off the ground.
Bounce allows a Pokemon to leave the battlefield for a full turn, so where's the gravity? Being up in the air during the first turn of Fly is sensible, but this? You can use Bounce and literally sit for 15 minutes before choosing the next move, and still be in the air.
Smack Down and Gravity should result in instant death in Sky Battles, since matches take place high up in the sky and both of these moves would cause the Pokemon to fall from very high up without their flying attribute to save them. Also, Iron Ball is apparently legal in Sky Battles, and it makes Flying-type and Levitate null, which should result in suicide right off the bat.
Ingrain is passable by Baton Pass, and this is disgusting. First of all, Ingrain makes you unable to manually switch because you're affixed to the ground beneath you by your roots. So what happens when Smeargle Baton Passes it, do the roots disconnect and then attach to the incoming teammate to continue restoring health? Eww. It's also weird that Ingrain can be used in buildings on high-up floors where there's definitely no place for anything to "absorb nutrients with its roots!" It's even more hilarious that you can Baton Pass it to a Pokemon that knows Fly. Explain how that works lol
Held Items
Here are some combinations of Pokemon and held items I had in mind that I find amusing, because they either are physically impossible or should have an added effect based on relevant information:
Spoink holding Big Pearl or Pearl String
Spoink's Pokemon Sapphire dex entry cites how it's constantly on the hunt for a bigger pearl. Well damn, let it hold the item Big Pearl and see how happy it gets. It should never have to look for anything again in its life. The item Pearl String, introduced in BW, should increase Spoink's Return to like 400 Base Power.
Magnezone holding Choice Specs
This isn't exactly a rare concept, so this won't be hard to envision. Spectacles are designed for two eyes side by side, and as evidenced by the official art drawn to portray this item, this case is no different. I bet Magnezone has a hard time putting them on and keeping them on, as is the case with Dusclops and every other one-eyed creature in the Pokemon world.
Slugma holding Snowball
This is allowed, and for good reason. Just because snow would disintegrate into nothing long before making direct contact with molten magma, it doesn't mean Slugma can't hold a Snowball and keep it intact until it gets hit by an Ice-type attack.
Anything holding BlackGlasses
This should change a Pokemon drastically, from becoming more sassy, more cool-looking, or to give off the appearance of a gangster, a celebrity, or an FBI agent.
Electrode holding Iron Ball
What a true baller. This makes no sense competitively at all, but it makes even less sense physically. While it is entirely capable of having Iron Ball as a held item in Pokemon, there is literally no way Electrode can possibly hold anything, and certainly not an Iron Ball. It's a ball itself.
Shellos holding Shoal Salt
LOL
Diglett/Dugtrio holding Air Balloon
How long can GameFreak justify their laziness behind never drawing/spriting the lower body of Diglett and Dugtrio? What happens when they have an Air Balloon equipped? Does the dirt around Diglett and Dugtrio levitate as well? Does a whole chunk of land disconnect from Earth and levitate with them for it maintain its hidden bottom half?
----
Sorry if I got a little carried away. ♥ I'll probably be adding more to this if it is approved. I'm interested in trying this kind of approach while writing. I hope you like my idea!
Some of the things I want to highlight are as follows:
Moves
Diglett and Dugtrio learn Slash, Aerial Ace, and Sucker Punch, but what exactly are they attacking with? If it is assumed that their claws or whatever are hidden underground, why do we never see them? Why does the dirt seem to enter the Poke Ball with them and surround them again when they are sent out? It's also interesting that the dirt flies with them across the screen when any of the aforementioned attacks are used, and then they return to their original sprite animation with the surrounding dirt appearing completely undisturbed.
Wingull learns Shock Wave, but is 4x weak to Electric. How does it create the energy needed to use this attack without severely hurting itself in the process?
Kyurem cannot learn Frost Breath, when literally every other Ice-type can. Why is the ultimate Ice Pokemon left out?
Hitmonchan cannot learn Sucker Punch, but Hitmonlee and Hitmontop can. Even though Sucker Punch means "Surprise Attack" in literal translation from Japanese, it's still weird that the other two Tyrogue evolutions get a move with Punch in the name, but the punching-based evolution doesn't.
Shroomish learns Drain Punch and Focus Punch, but has no means of using the moves in any logical sense. It has no hands, hand-like appendages, or even arms, making the use of these attacks physically impossible.
Dive is usable in battle in non-aquatic environments, where there is no water to dive into. This includes roads and forests... But what about buildings? What about volcanic places? LOL
Shedinja has access to Final Gambit, dealing a whopping 1 HP worth of damage to the foe before sacrificing itself in the process.
Rhydon and Rhyperior are able to use Surf, but are 4x weak to Water. In-game it makes no sense that it should be able to knowingly and directly immerse itself into something it's deathly weak to without some kind of consequence.
Pidgey learns Fly, but is 1 foot tall and weighs 4 pounds. If this is to be used in-game at all, how does it carry the player to different towns throughout a given region? There's no way it can support the weight of a 10-year old human being, and if someone tried to grab onto its feet to fly with it, it would never get off the ground.
Bounce allows a Pokemon to leave the battlefield for a full turn, so where's the gravity? Being up in the air during the first turn of Fly is sensible, but this? You can use Bounce and literally sit for 15 minutes before choosing the next move, and still be in the air.
Smack Down and Gravity should result in instant death in Sky Battles, since matches take place high up in the sky and both of these moves would cause the Pokemon to fall from very high up without their flying attribute to save them. Also, Iron Ball is apparently legal in Sky Battles, and it makes Flying-type and Levitate null, which should result in suicide right off the bat.
Ingrain is passable by Baton Pass, and this is disgusting. First of all, Ingrain makes you unable to manually switch because you're affixed to the ground beneath you by your roots. So what happens when Smeargle Baton Passes it, do the roots disconnect and then attach to the incoming teammate to continue restoring health? Eww. It's also weird that Ingrain can be used in buildings on high-up floors where there's definitely no place for anything to "absorb nutrients with its roots!" It's even more hilarious that you can Baton Pass it to a Pokemon that knows Fly. Explain how that works lol
Held Items
Here are some combinations of Pokemon and held items I had in mind that I find amusing, because they either are physically impossible or should have an added effect based on relevant information:
Spoink holding Big Pearl or Pearl String
Spoink's Pokemon Sapphire dex entry cites how it's constantly on the hunt for a bigger pearl. Well damn, let it hold the item Big Pearl and see how happy it gets. It should never have to look for anything again in its life. The item Pearl String, introduced in BW, should increase Spoink's Return to like 400 Base Power.
Magnezone holding Choice Specs
This isn't exactly a rare concept, so this won't be hard to envision. Spectacles are designed for two eyes side by side, and as evidenced by the official art drawn to portray this item, this case is no different. I bet Magnezone has a hard time putting them on and keeping them on, as is the case with Dusclops and every other one-eyed creature in the Pokemon world.
Slugma holding Snowball
This is allowed, and for good reason. Just because snow would disintegrate into nothing long before making direct contact with molten magma, it doesn't mean Slugma can't hold a Snowball and keep it intact until it gets hit by an Ice-type attack.
Anything holding BlackGlasses
This should change a Pokemon drastically, from becoming more sassy, more cool-looking, or to give off the appearance of a gangster, a celebrity, or an FBI agent.
Electrode holding Iron Ball
What a true baller. This makes no sense competitively at all, but it makes even less sense physically. While it is entirely capable of having Iron Ball as a held item in Pokemon, there is literally no way Electrode can possibly hold anything, and certainly not an Iron Ball. It's a ball itself.
Shellos holding Shoal Salt
LOL
Diglett/Dugtrio holding Air Balloon
How long can GameFreak justify their laziness behind never drawing/spriting the lower body of Diglett and Dugtrio? What happens when they have an Air Balloon equipped? Does the dirt around Diglett and Dugtrio levitate as well? Does a whole chunk of land disconnect from Earth and levitate with them for it maintain its hidden bottom half?
----
Sorry if I got a little carried away. ♥ I'll probably be adding more to this if it is approved. I'm interested in trying this kind of approach while writing. I hope you like my idea!
